1. New Year, New Attitude: Fucks I Won’t Give in 2014 Rant

    Frankly, I’ve spent the last few years investing the energy and positive intentions most people spend on the turn of the calendar year into my birthday in February. Selfish? Maybe, but that’s when my year rolls over and I get to start a new.

    I don’t really dig the whole new year/new resolutions thing. This year, I’m actually kind of neutral about January having arrived- no grim, no glory. There’s really a lot to be hopeful about given how things were going the last few weeks of 2013, but “eggs in baskets” aren’t really my thing anymore.

    That said I thought I’d borrow a framework from a blog post a friend shared and develop a different kind of intention for the year.

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    Fucks I Won’t Give in 2014

    1)   Other People’s Opinions About Being Single

    Why is being single seen as a deficit? The unattached is always depicted as lacking something, as being incomplete or without. Frankly, I’m finally feeling like I have quite a rounded and fulfilled life.  I have a job I like, I live in a fantastic apartment, I can pay my bills, visit friends I love/host them when they visit me, have some spending money here and there. I live in a city I would ride or die for, have my health, my family, amazing friends near and far, whats to complain about?

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    Nearing the end of my 30th year, not having a partner is what it is. I’m a complete person, who wants what everyone wants- companionship, an equal, a foil- but, and I mean this in the least “Single Ladies,” “Miss Independent” way possible, I’m aight with out it. It would certainly be a bonus to find a ride or die partner in crime that I don’t have to share with anyone, but after some recovery time from a 4 year relationship that ended in 2009, I’m actively not dating and cool with it. They say when you stop looking for something you find it and what not. I never really started, but universe, I’m open to whatever you want to throw my way.

    2)   Not Having My Dream Job

    I don’t love my job. I like my job. Most of the time. I love parts of what I do. But having dreams, and needing my dream job to realize itself are two different things. I’ve said this a million times over, but how does one find the perfect job that involves: comedy- stand up specifically, social justice work, education reform, writing, graffiti/art, dancing (I’m only really sharing this now, but I was in an international folk ballet for years and gave up dancing in college because I thought ‘big girls can’t jeté’ or some shit), critical theory analysis and make money having fun? The job doesn’t exactly exist.

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    Work defines me, to an extent, but I am not what I do. I am so much more. I can continue to dream, find ways to incorporate my interests into my life, but someone once said something along the lines of (yeah, Fucks I Won’t Give has turned into “deep shit someone once said”): “Work is the vehicle that gets you to the space where you live your life.” Yeah that’s not totally articulate there, but I think you get my point. 

    3)   Feeling Responsible for Fixing Other People’s Shit

    The Mag Familia inherently wants to help people. Two things concern us most, “Did you eat?” and “Do you have some place to stay?”  My job inherently involves changing people’s lives and I recently joined the board of an organization that’s trying to do the same.  It’s in me to help folks. And 2014, won’t be any different, however I have no more fucks to give about what happens when the help doesn’t work out. That’s not my shit to own, and I don’t know why I ever thought it was. I can’t use all my fucks on helping fix shit that’s not fixable, that’s bigger than me, than you, than whatever issues are actually at play. Can lead a horse to water, can’t make ‘em drink and shit. I can listen, I can probe, but I can’t transform, I can’t teach, there’s a reason I’m not on the classroom side of things. I’ll focus on my locus (5 cent rhyme/mantra for you there, going with the cheap hits).  My purpose in life isn’t to save lives- so much as work on changing them. Need a hand, no problem. Need a hero, call Enrique.

    4)   The Hubby, The Family, The House with a White Picket Fence and the American Dream

    30 has been a hard, but great year. It’s the year I owned the, “I’m too old for this shit” badge and in many ways gave up on a lot of bullshit I thought was supposed to be by now. I don’t have a house. I don’t have a husband. I don’t have a baby. Don’t own a car. I love bourbon and rye on the rocks but giggle at fart jokes. All sociological exceptions (economy, living in SF, point above re: my stance on being single et. Al.) aside: who cares?  

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    Fuck the American Dream, we all know that’s changing, but being 30 and without these “adult” milestones, I can’t give any more fucks about what I don’t have. What I have is an awesome relationship with my parents, sister who will ride along with my weird schemes but also drag me on her own, the most loving- down ass group of friends spread across the country who get me, know me and know the perfect balance of pushing and coddling being my friend requires. I’ve paid off one of many student loans, have an MA in a field I care about and have a low-level government job I don’t hate.  It’s not for lack of wanting– home ownership, a life partner, off spring and even a dog sound great. In 2014- can’t act like those are give-ins anymore. Some days I’m not even sure I want it sometimes.  On some real, real, How to Make it in America shit, maybe my American Dream isn’t so much about these ideals, but more about surviving and (I deserve to be shot for this) and thriving.

    —— 

    Some fucks I won’t give this next year… at least I’ll actively try not to. I’m sure there will be others to add, the list will evolve and develop. No more Harbaughing about the above if I can help it.

    Happy January y’all. 

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  2. thecitygraphics:

Week 16: The Niners are Headed to the Playoffs! San Francisco 49ers: 34 - Atlanta Falcons: 24 on Monday Night Football. Farewell to Candlestick! Designed by http://Facebook.com/TheCityGraphics. All images copyright of their respective owners.

    thecitygraphics:

    Week 16: The Niners are Headed to the Playoffs! San Francisco 49ers: 34 - Atlanta Falcons: 24 on Monday Night Football. Farewell to Candlestick! Designed by http://Facebook.com/TheCityGraphics. All images copyright of their respective owners.

  3. Truth

    shitmystudentswrite:

    Sojourner Truth is the Beyonce of Suffrage.

    Wow

  4. buzzfeed:

    High Schoolers Staged A Massive Sit-In After Their Vice Principal Was Ousted Over Same-Sex Marriage

  5. thugkitchen:

Yeah it’s cold as fuck outside but that’s no reason tofight over the thermostat. Instead, head to the kitchen andregulate your body temperature with this toasty toddy. GRAB A BIG ASS BLANKET AND POUR YOURSELF A GODDAMN HUG IN A MUG.

GRAPEFRUIT HOT TODDY
2 cups of water 2 bags of black tea½ cup fresh grapefruit juice (about 1 grapefruit)2 shots of bourbon1 tablespoon maple syrup (whatever liquid sweetener you gotwill do)2 cinnamon sticks (totally fucking optional)
Bring the water to a boil on the stove with a kettle orwhateverthefuck else you use. In a large measuring glass orheat-safe pitcher add the grapefruit juice, bourbon, maplesyrup, and cinnamon sticks. When the water is boiling, pourit into the pitcher, add the tea bags, and cover thatmotherfucker to keep it warm while the flavors mix. Let thetea steep for 3 minutes. Take out the tea bags and cinnamonsticks and serve that shit immediately.
Makes 2 drinks or one big ass cup of comfort

Yes…

    thugkitchen:

    Yeah it’s cold as fuck outside but that’s no reason to
    fight over the thermostat. Instead, head to the kitchen and
    regulate your body temperature with this toasty toddy. GRAB A BIG ASS BLANKET AND POUR YOURSELF A GODDAMN HUG IN A MUG.

    GRAPEFRUIT HOT TODDY

    2 cups of water

    2 bags of black tea

    ½ cup fresh grapefruit juice (about 1 grapefruit)

    2 shots of bourbon

    1 tablespoon maple syrup (whatever liquid sweetener you got
    will do)

    2 cinnamon sticks (totally fucking optional)


    Bring the water to a boil on the stove with a kettle or
    whateverthefuck else you use. In a large measuring glass or
    heat-safe pitcher add the grapefruit juice, bourbon, maple
    syrup, and cinnamon sticks. When the water is boiling, pour
    it into the pitcher, add the tea bags, and cover that
    motherfucker to keep it warm while the flavors mix. Let the
    tea steep for 3 minutes. Take out the tea bags and cinnamon
    sticks and serve that shit immediately.


    Makes 2 drinks or one big ass cup of comfort

    Yes…

  6. Open Letter to the Mission Newbs →

    itstimetoriseup:

    Welcome to the Mission.

    You’ve decided to get into this relationship with the Mission because of her culture, her appeal, her ample transportation and food choices, and her potential for progress. She’s alluring, she’s beautiful, she’s dangerous, and hey, rent’s alright on your salary!

    But let…

  7. brokeymcpoverty:

    haaaa

    (Source: lizacomepizza)

  8. When my single friends and I are talking about our married friends

    myfriendsaremarried:

    and we’re just like…

    image

  9. latenightjimmy:

    Musical guests Yo Gabba Gabba, with surprise guest Biz Markie, perform “Christmas is Upon Us”!

  10. so-treu:

    ash-wednesday:

    omg best put down

    LUCILLE!!!!!!!

    (Source: glendascarells)